the Power Patriots in America 20XX: the Right (Invisible) Hand of Capitalism

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More Night Time Madness

So last night, I dreamed that a Hijinks-like show was going on. I remember going to rehearsal with Jon, Greg, and Dave. I think other WH people were there, but I only remember them. I guess because I've been seeing them so much due to the play and such. Anyway, I remember we were at a performance and afterwards we drove to a store to get things, I am guessing it was a liquor store. And Jon was talking about how he had a dream that previous night where he met some mega hot chick and crazy stuff happened (perhaps he mentioned a dream because we've both been talking about how we have crazy dreams, lately?). A car pulls in in the next to us and some mega hot chick, who was exactly the girl in his dream, gets out of the car and walks into the store. Jon doesn't say anything, but just gets out of the car and hurries in. I see him talking and flirting with her through the window, but because I'm under 21 I can't go in and do anything. I get out of the car really angrily and walk to Greg and Dave's house. They live on the second floor of a super nice house in the dream (as opposed to the first floor of a pretty decent house) and below them is a bunch of guys who are drug dealers. I pass them closing a deal as I go inside Greg and Dave's and then just sit around their empty house, really upset that Jon left me. I take out his bowl and stuff, which he'd asked me to carry, and sat in their apartment smoking by myself.
I heard someone walking up the stairs talking and it was Dave and Greg, cause I could hear them through the door, talking about how Jon went home with that other girl.
Then I woke up cause my alarm went off.

Not a very good dream.

Strange Dreaming...

I already had a brief post of my weird dreams in my livejournal, but it's starting to get ridiculous. After Jon said he's also been having odd dreams, I have to wonder if there's just something in the water down in New Brunswick or something. I very rarely remember my dreams, and when I do I forget the details really quickly. However, though my memories of these recent dreams are highly fragmented, if anything that lends to the sense of oddness around them.
I had one dream that featured the members of CAP about 20 years from now. In this alter-reality dream-world, we had pulled off some kind of heist years previous and then went our seperate ways. Holly was managing some kind ballet theater but also running a massive drug ring... I stole money from her via blackmail I think. I remember a part of the dream where I was clutching the money and pointing a gun at her while I slowly backed out of the building we were in (her theater). Jon and I had broken up in the dream, and he'd married Emma and they had a daughter with outrageously curly (but also absolutely adorable) blonde hair. I guess blonde cause Emma's in dyed that color-- since neither of them are blondes. I think also met Greg for lunch at some kind of mall-esque food court in the bottom floor of a hotel, but then realized I was being tailed by whatever enemies I had in the dream and there was a chase scene.

Another dream involved a war in a marsh lands, in which everyone lived, and we were evacuating on rafts. My Uncle Chris was there, whom I haven't seen for several years, which was odd; though he works in the military so maybe that's why he was in a war-dream. Anyway all I really remember of that dream was that there were planes flying overhead and an explosion and the raft rocked really hard, knocking Uncle Chris off and into the water. The raft wouldn't stop to get him and I couldn't reach him/pull him up. I remember thinking how it was all my fault, and how my mom was going to yell at me so much for losing him (weird that I imagined her yelling, as Chris is my father's sister's husband, so I imagine that side of the family would be far more angry).

Another dream was also water-bound, but I remember so little of it. Something about dolphins. And a train that went over the water-- it reminds me of the train from Spirited Away.

Last night I had a dream where I was arrested for some sort of parking ticket(?) and sentenced to 2 years in prison. It was a pretty nice prison though. White plaster walls, good lighting... We wore our own clothing. One entire wall was nothing but bars and the door, and that was pretty much the only normal thing about it. Everyone was also really nice; it had a feeling between prisoners that was reminiscent of a sleep away camp. Jon had also been arrested for something, I don't know what but he was there in the cell either across from me or next to me, I don't remember. But I do remember that he broke out and escaped, but left me behind. At one point he snuck back into the jail with Lauryn (my older sister) in order to visit me and all the prisoners he'd made friends with. He refused to break me out, though, because he said he'd been so successful and living secretly as an escaped convict and he told me it would ruin everything if he broke me out too. I was really upset by that of course, and when I started crying and begging him to break me out he left and there was this whole dramatic dream scene that involved me reaching through the bars after him while he walked away as I dropped to my knees with a forlorn "Nooooooo!" My cell mate comforted me, which was nice of her.
There was a part of the dream where I got to go outside and walk in a forest; the idea of it actually reminds me now of Cinderella 2000 when she goes out into the forest... without the sketchy space Fairy Godfather and giant rabbit sex and stuff. It was like, if you get enough merits for good behavior or something you can go outside. I remember I had been given a notebook by someone I met out there and was so happy to be able to write that I spent the whole time in the forest sitting and writing. Then when I had to go back to the jail, they wouldn't let me keep the notebook and I was so upset. I remember sitting at a desk while they processed me back inside or something, crying and begging them to just let me have the notebook.
I think I woke up around then, but I'm not sure; there may have been more, but that's the most vivid memory of any of my recent dreams I have.


What's going on in my head?

Batspices!

I just had a dream where I was in Dark Knight. But since I have gone out of my way not to know anything about the movie, the scene of course made no sense.
I was in a gigantic factory with Batman and other people and the Joker was making Batman succeed at all these weird challenges.
I don't remember the set up, but all I know is I got crushed beneath an obscene weight of cinnamon, under a door, while holding Batman's hand and yelling that he had to promise not to leave without me.

Wtf.

A Song Featuring My Self Esteem

"I am wrecked, I am overblown.
I'm also fed up with the common cold.
But I just hate to say goodbye
To all the metaphors and lies
That have taken me years to come up with...

Says it's true; say you like me (I like you)
Just for the night, for me it's been eternity.
And as I gently sip this drink
I think about my lack of future
And all the places I could learn to fall in love.

I know I shouldn't waste my time
Wishing I'd been better designed,
Yet for some reason still think

I am wrecked, I am overblown.
I'm also fed up with the fucking common cold.
When I want to feel alive
For the first time in my life
I just want to feel attractive today..."

- Motion City Soundtrack

As the next installment of my Me-Soundtrack, I think it's pretty self explanatory, though one of the reasons I chose this song to represent my self-image qualms is because I connect it to the friend who first played it for me; not due to the lyrics really, but due to the memories I have of amazing conversations with my Skeletal Structure sister(you know who you are!).

Self esteem issues in a young adult American female!!?!
Wtf?!

It's Like a Muse Slapped Me in the Face

I have some ideas to start writing about. I hope it works out... I haven't had story inspiration in years! I was inspired by someone I know over the course of a week vacation in Wildwood. He self-published a book and it's doing alright for a self-published book; I read a few passages and holy crap. I wrote better than that when I was in seventh grade. Well, I wrote about the same back then; my writing has certainly improved. Especially since I know a lot more about how books are structured than I ever used to.
I think I'm going to dredge up a novel I did finish writing (several years ago). It was terrible, but I think I'm going to take the story and alter it a bit... well, alter it a lot. Whole new plot, characters, style... just some things I want to keep.

I also came up with lots of ideas for my zombie movie, with much help from my friend Lyndsey.
I am stoked to get some writing done in the next few days!